Donna (elfinmajic) wrote,


today i got the news you don't want to hear - your in your head affair is ending-- how stupid is this...
why i find it devastating I don't know, but when someone is in your head a lot, you hate for them to go away. I see Mrs everyday and today he announced he is moving on... it is like the secret thoughts in your head will be over because i won't see him again... and it makes me sad inside because to me he was more in my head than in real life. You know how you convinece yourself - your life revolves around him. You get up and go to a wierd job because of him, you think of any reason to speak or just stand beside him. You watch his reactions to everything... you think about what he is wearing... and it makes me ill that I have to start a new relationship with someone who is NOT as incredible as him. On the other hand, he is moving on... we have nothing but a work relationship with HIS side being totally totally professional and mine only wishful thinking... but it leaves me wishing someone wanted me in that same way.... just to have another option than where I am...
so am I sick at heart... yeah heartsick is true...

so I m sickeningly sappy tonight and sad...
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Ugh. I know just what you mean! I'm sorry...I hope you find someone new soon....


March 26 2007, 02:19:23 UTC 11 years ago

yeah it sucks... he has no idea - but he is awesome... and I don't want to work with anyone else... so that sucks... I still have my one friend from online we see each other now and then... but I don't want him or fantasize about him... he is just a person to talk to, who likes me and yet has no part in my ordinary life... which I am finding to be completely boring here lately.

Where are you and whats up?
I forgot to log in.. that last quote was me...d
Hey girl,
Sorry it took so long for me to write back.
Are you feeling any better now?
I am still in Durango, still loving it, especially since I started my new job (the manager job at the coffee company.) It keeps me on my toes and I LOVE IT! My love life is up and down. Right now it is UP which is very scary for me. I've gotten to the point where it's almost easier to just give up and be alone than to risk heartache. Almost, but not quite. I get way too lonely.
Well, send me an email and fill me in on the details of your life, ok? And I will do the same!
Love, K